Top ten tidbits of Advice that should have been shared but wasn’t.
1. Do not drink your bath water, or anyone else’s. Nothing good will come of this.
2. Never trust a fart. The odds are stacked against your underwear.
3. Never shout “HEY, WATCH THIS!” when you are 14 beers into your creativity.
4. Never buy a guinnea pig off of Craig’s list. Trust me on this one.
5. Building your own cannon, rocket, trebuchet, or castle moat may result in an unfavorable news story about you and your fugitive status.
6. If it has fangs, claws, or notoriously ill tempered don’t tease it. If you do, the nice ambulance driver will ask if you learned your lesson.
7. Hookers don’t fish. So don’t ask’em where’s a good place to catch sump’n.
8. When your alone in an elevator, don’t fart. As soon as you do, someone else will get on board.
9. Don’t see how many shots you can do in 30 mins. Because the next shots you take will be mug shots.
10. Don’t start a top ten list if you only have 9 things to list